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Monday, February 28, 2011


From my Lady to you. Get your disco ass in gear. Crank it up. (Not Punk, but it makes her groooove.)

Here we go.

The police officer looked in our bags before he asked for our IDs. "What is this, clothing?"

Katheena stepped up and spoke with a Hispanish accent. "This is work for me to repair to make the piquito extra dinero."

Now, police officers back then in Fuckno did not want to get involved with Imigration Services for illegal aliens. That would mean a lot of paperwork, and therefore a lot of two-fingered-typing. That was shit for another agency, not theirs, not them.

Just then, students in the buildings began to throw shit through the windows. No, not out of windows: through the windows.

Our police officer's radio squeaked to life. "All officers on hand, 10-100! Secure the classrooms!"

He tossed our bags back to us and said over his shoulder as he ran, "This is your lucky day."

As we ran off to our cars in the parking lot, students behind us were making a mess.

I turned to Katheena, who I was out-running in my own panic mode. "So you can do accents?"

Katheena caught up to me and then dusted me. "Yah, Veeee-ill. Zat I can dooo."


From my son Gabriel to you. Smooth it out.

Of course I got busted, once I showed up back at my house. But only Lorelei and I got into trouble, no one else did. The school was sending Lorelei home immediately. We managed to evade capture at school, and that was good for our friends, and also for Ivan, that fucker. They would have been accomplices if they'd been busted along with us. We left the school parking lot in our three vehicles and met up at Katheena's dad's Thai restaurant.

We got our story straight. No mention of rocket tickets. I don't know what Lorelei said to her exchanged parents or the police or the school, but I knew it wouldn't be much more than "Fuck You.'

I did get a chance to see Lorelei chust one more time before I never saw her ever again.

It was at the police station.

You see, after we left the restaurant in our cars, Joey and Nolei in his maroon Granny-mobile, and Katheena with Ivan in her Golden bad-assery, I went home to face the music.

Now I must tell you about my mom. She was a political activist in the late sixties, early seventies, and she did not like the police. Nowadays, they probably lock up such outspoken free-thinkers as terrerrissts or someshit.

And so when the popo came to her front door looking for me later thata day, she told them to fuck off.

Then, when I showed up after the School fiasco, she had some questions for me.

She also had her own answers for me.

But this is what she said after she grabbed me, hugged me, then pushed me back and slapped my face.

"Don't you EVER bring the POLICE to my front door AGAIN. DO YOU HEAR ME?"

I about shit my pants, and my left eye welled up with a tear from the stinging bitch-slap she'd dealt me.

"Loud and clear, mom."

She grabbed me again and hugged me. "Don't want anything to happen to you, and especially from your own foolishness. Now what the hell is going on?"

Mom was cool like that. She had quite a bit of experience with the popo.

She listened to me then and there, while I told her about Lorelei. I just didn't mention the Moonshot, baby.


As much as mom despised authority, she brought me to the police station to give my statement. Lorelei's exchanged parents were there, and her exchanged dad had a purple shiner.

Those purple shiners are pretty with a pink feather boa and a nice pair of high heels. Well, he simply looked like he'd been bitch slapped himself. And that was the charge he was pressing upon me.

Lorelei's eyes lit up when she saw me, and that made me smile. They did not let us speak to each other. They wanted my statement, not any collusion between us.

My mom had told me not to offer any more than an answer to each question that they asked. She told me don't be nervous, which did not help. She told me to be polite, which did help.

We had kids had put together a story that we all agreed upon.

Visit TDC tomorrow to hear the rest of this chapter, if you like.


Interesting thread meme going on in the Mighty TDC Forum: animals and their, umm, courters.

Spunky14u continued with this new thread on the subject:

Fast Cast commented: "Think he has the cash to pony up for an attorney?"

Spunky14u said, "He was just feeling a little horse when things got out of control."

Sirchief had his own response, "Is he from Wilmer or Wilbur?" and "Should've been charged with risk of injury to a mini."

Jambo quoted the article, "Quote:
Alabama has no specific provision in its sexual abuse laws to cover bestiality. 'Nuff said."

Bollock responded with, "He did leave his wallet, which implies he was prepared to pay for it. As an added bonus, the gee-gee was into bondage." Bollock is from Britland and points in between. Gee-gee is Britlandese for "solid-hoofed herbivorous quadruped."

Then Jambo wrote this:

Big wheels keep on turning
Carry me home to see my kin
Bark, oink, and whinnie in the Southland
I miss Alabamy once again
Bestiality is a sin, yes it is...

Well I heard ole Wilbur sing about her
I heard Mr Ed done put her down
Well, I hope those boys will remember
That video of them that's around

Sweet home Alabama
Where the fillies always screw
Sweet Home Alabama
Lord, I'm coming home to you
Here I come, Alabama

In Birmingham they love their livestock
Horses, dogs and donkeys too
Now man-beast love doesn't bug me
Does your conscience bother you?
Tell me true

Sweet home Alabama
Where the bitches will screw you
Sweet Home Alabama
Lord, I'm coming home to you

Now a Wilmer man was arrested
For giving a mini-horse a screw
But at least he ain't no faggot
He wouldn't do a stallion too
Now how about you?

Sweet home Alabama
Where the critters love you true
Sweet Home Alabama
Lord, I'm coming home to you

Holy Fuck.

The other threads are also a bit nawsty, but they exist in the Forum for you to check out.

Here are your links.

Has it been twenty years since these were the hot models? Get me my walker and make me a nice pot of tea. I'm old.

What The Fuck Has Obama Done So Far?



Wireless electricity?

Invisible wall.


Spice Girl. Ad, Parody....

More about her, NSFW.


See you tomorrow, same Bat Time, same Bat Channel.

God Help You.

God Help Us All.

---willies out.


One more for ya.

Dotta says that This Could Be All Yours Someday.

Give some love to Guster. Dotta says so.


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