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Monday, February 28, 2011

59 The Price, The Cost, and The Value

We ran out of the Dance like Lorelei's Mercury-white hair had caught the drapes on fire.

We didn't look back.

Germans ran out everywhere, and some angry, large jocks, followed by teachers wanting parents' phone numbers came after us, but I had my Celica parked at the green-painted iron gates in the front of the school, like some asshole who parks his car in two slots so no one can bump his paint.

Douche-baggery, yes. But you must realize, I'd had in mind some sort of "classiness" to open our doors for our German ladies, Lorelei and No-Lay, at the front gate when we'd first arived. And I'd left it there, because I'd been full of douche-pride.

Little Lion Man Joey would agree about that.

However, this was now our escape pod, from this harsh planet of brawlers chasing us, and those angry high-school-chaperone-teachers needing information.

Thank goodness my ride had not been towed.

If you have ever been in panic mode, then you know that you may drop your keys while trying to open a locked door. This is why scantily-clad co-eds will stumble over a tree root when a man in a hockey mask is chasing them with a chainsaw.

This did not happen here. Lucky, or simply fortunate? I always opt for the latter, and I will tell you why in a bit.

We four hopped in, and my little bitch roared to life.

This is when I squealed my tires, and we were gone, baby, gone.

+ + + + + +

Lorelei looked over at me as I speed shifted and shot out MacLane High like a man on a moon mission.

Joey and Nolei bumped their heads when I swerved and it sounded like coconuts.

"Ow! What the FUCK?"

I dared a glance at Lorelei what with all the stunt-driving stuff I was doing.

She was looking at me with moony eyes.

I attributed this to the flask she had chugged. I wasn't completely wrong about that, but I missed something else, something kinda important.

The light up ahead turned red, and I gunned it, and we flew though the intersection missing a police car's rear-bumper by two inches, before crashing into the Taco Hell on the right.

I kid you. Ya know.

I slowed to a respectable stop at the light, given my adrenaline, and turned back to her saying, "So, did you have fun?"

She threw her hairy armpits around my shoulders and pressed her mouth against mine.

I tasted Austrian liquor, mint gum, and I smelled her perfume. It was a scent that would always haunt me forever after.

So, hairy armpits on a chick is odd, but maybe kinda kinky? She did not smell like armpits.

She smelled pretty friggin good.

Well, ok, yes, it was very odd for a young, un-worldly 'Murican dude, but also, well, I wondered if the carpet matched the drapes.

Care to to find out?

+ + + + + +

We ended up at the outskirts of Clovis in a bit, on a country road.

Outskirts, off-skirts, you decide, my friend.

+ + + + + +

On Monday:

The teachers wanted to know if we had been drinking.

The parents did too.

Lorelei was in trouble for her outburst at the dance.

Her punkology, her mettle at the dance had shown me how to be strong in the face of adversity: One has to call bullshit when they see it.

I have since ascribed to this tenet, whatever the cost.

Wait, what is this difference between price and cost? I will tell you here, my friend.

The difference between a price you pay and the cost of it to you is simple economics:

A price is a set standard: anyone who wants a thing will fork over the money for this item; the price is printed on the tag.

But the Cost of it to you is the impact upon you for handing over something you may not have much of, and so it costs less if you are rich instead of poor.

"Cost" means how much it matters to you.

This can cost you a lot. Even if you don't quite appreciate the value of it, just yet.

+ + + + + +

Her kisses swept my face and she breathed in a shallow, throaty sort of way. Her tongue thrust into my mouth, and she tried to deep throat me, but I was not the taker, that was her "job." I ended up with her mint gum in my mouth, which I gladly chewed.

The light was green, and we shot off into outer space.

She was a bit hot and bothered. I think that we all were. There was only one way to cool our jets from our travel to Mercury and back.

It would take a ride to the outskirts of Clovis, where the light pollution was always zero, and the stars covered every inch of the night sky, between Fuckno and the Sierra Mountains. From north to south of the valley, stars touched the ground.

If you weren't careful, you might trip and fall off the face of the world.

I slowed my Celica to a crawl, and noticed that the lights looked funny. Looking around, I felt something in my mouth: a tiny bit of plastic with overtones of a chemical of some sort.

Joey and Nolei pushed against the front seats to be let out of the hot little car, into the cooling, arid air of the high desert in this moonlit evening. It would turn out to be a bit of a long evening.

They began to giggle, then laugh, and Joey had to go behind the vehicle to take a piss.

"It's not working!" He laughed again.

Lorelei came around to the front where I stood and she hugged me. Her arms felt sooooo soooooffffttt....

I looked into her eyes, and in the light of the headlamps of my tiny but fast little bitch, I saw that her pupils were dialated.

They were fucking big, large black holes where the green sun in them used to shine.

I felt the urge to laugh, but I was sweating, and I had a question.

"Lorelei. When we kissed back at the stoplight, what did you do?"

She smirked, and she held me tight, very close to her breasts.

"I give you a rocket ticket. In your mouth."

Uh, Wha?

+ + + + + +


Butter safe comic for your Saturday.

This is the latest.

They go back a bit. Start at the first? OK, I'll help you with that. You haven't had our coffee jump yet.

Mutant worm and it's spidey silk: crazy strong.

Blonde joke: male blondes.

For those of you who still read, here are 10 great science fiction books that have been banned... oh.. I lost you with all the words.... (just being a dick here, sorry).

Cool pic site, from Russia with love.

Searching for shit takes skillz. Sometimes... (Cartoon for ya)

Little planets, created by a dude with solid Photoshop skills.

More comics for your Saturday. Whenwolves overtake wherewolves.

Cartoon pic about grammar. Sorry about that. But funny.

More pics: this site has a lot of cool compilations. This one is "Rain Pics."

College Humor: Drunk-O-Vision comparison. For tonight?

God Help You.

God Help Us All.

---willies out.

One More For Ya.

Social Networking Kill video, Part One.


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