20

willies wrote and published this tale on April 10, 2010.


Press play baby, and let's GO...





Sean could not start the fucking Jeep. The other two of we four brothers were laughing their asses off in this new "realty," and they were quite distracting.


Apu walked over to the front, and peered out of the double glass doors of the 7-11.

He had the wireless phone in his hand, about to do some dialing. He looked concerned.

Ya think?

Now, mind you, "wireless phone" means the old style, really a landline, not a cell phone. No one had those things back then, except rich guys.

Good thing. We might have buzz-called folks.

And we were off in another Land.

Another Realty.


Sean found the right key, jammed it in, and turned it.

The Jeep rumbled awake, which was quite comforting to hear and feel...


...Until the radio came on. It blasted the music we had been jamming to when we arrived at this portal, this 7-11, just before the ZID kicked in.


Sean looked up at Apu, then he looked at me with wide eyes, with wide pupils.

Apu pulled the phone up to his dark face, and he began to press buttons. Then his hand hovered over the phone for a moment. It appeared that he was waiting to press the "call" button.


I shut the radio off and looked back at the other two, in the rear seats of the open-air Jeep.

"SHUT THE FUCK UP YOU ASHOLES!"

They did. I reached over and grabbed Sean by the Fuckno, Californication Bullard High School Football Jersey with both hands and I looked him right in the eye.

This here moment would be replayed again, in other situations, and under the influence of other chemicals, but it would always connect us.

Every time. I became the "Navigator" of this new land, this new realty.

"Sean. You can do this. Look at me. LOOK at me."

His face stopped looking all panicky for a moment.

"It's me. No matter what you think is going on, I believe in you. This is all just bullshit. We can see though it, underneath it. Don't you agree?"


Sean straightened the hell up. He remembered who he was.

He was a huge young man who broke faces. He always crossed the line, and came back without serious injury, without penalty, but with victory, of a sort.

And, unintentionally, I was the cause of his further de-evolution.

You will witness this de-evloution of Sean in future chapters, do not doubt.

De-evolution has a shorter nickname.

It is DEVO. It was the 80's. Don't look at me that way.




SO,


Sean got his shit together, which was quite amazing to see.


He put that bitch in reverse, looked over his shoulder, and glared at those two assholes behind us.

"Keep Your Fucking Dick Sucking Holes Clamped Shut You Mother Fuckers."


Sean got us the hell out of there.


Yee fucking Haw.


++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++



Join me tomorrow for an explanation of how we crashed into an irrigation canal full of water. It will be quite elucidating, I promise you.


++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

It's always been this way.



Don't be left out in the storm.



Corny picalogue strip with lobstahs. Mmmm. Lobstahs...



Funny Hyperbole blog. Look up Hyperbole.



A good "ARegister" story about some dude and his problem with giant checks. No, not Giant Chicks. That would be cool to see. Umm, errmmm... Wait, why does this fucker have a problem with winning money? Dumbass.

Hmmm...

Interesting take on world politics, in a daily cartoon pic.



Sad to see Russia is still censoring something that would have been an OK look at women stripping in front of the public for the opening of a store.

Meh to you, Russian Censhorship fuckers.

This is how we do it, NSFW Style, 'Merican Style. All you Cuntries out there enjoy suckling on the big teat of 'Merica, don't you?

Then fucking step up and help US out, damn you. US as in U.S.


Antidote:


This is a pretty cool site. You may know of it. All pics. It's funny junk, for your Saturday viewing pleasure. Explore this site.




Finally, my favorite subject, on one of my favorite sites. Robots on TED, by Penis Hung. I mean, Dennis Hong. Sorry about that.




Thank you for checking out my tales on your Saturday.

See you Tomorrow for a Sunday Side Show.

God Help You.

God Help Us All.


---willies out.