You will find yourself at the bottom of a hole someday.
If you had the opportunity to escape, would you take it?
No Glory In This Story, by Lhasa de Sela. Thank you Lisa for this find.
The Fuckno Wars
Chapter One
Part Two
Books
We stood at the fence of the horse corral and we were at the lowest point of our lives.
I shivered in my leather jacket. It was still wet from having dived into an algae ridden pool, trying to drown another jacket, the one that No One wore. The only other thing he wore was a knitted kilt.
No One said, “They are afraid of you. She says that they do not know your power. She says they think that you don’t either.”
Hah?
Power? I had no idea what the hell he was saying. I thought that he didn’t either. He’d said that he was talking to a ghost girl, you know.
“She says that because you destroyed this place and took some books they been looking for, that you are a threat.”
Books?
What the fuck?
The books, you recall, were in the back of Katheena’s golden car, Phoenix , buried in the desert silt up to its neck. But we had no clue about those books at all.
The Lion Man shook his head and whistled a long, descending note. He said, “Wow. That electric fence really fucked you up, dude. You better sit down and take a breather.”
No One shook his own head. He said, “We ain’t got time for a breather. They on their way here now.”
I looked at the Lion Man. “They’re not here now? Well fuck it. Let’s go!”
He nodded, and we climbed over the corral fence and crept towards the destroyed mansion. We would have no other chance to do such a thing. We didn’t know what we would find. Maybe we would find nothing. That would be awful. All this for nothing and then hell to pay come daylight.
If we weren’t careful and quiet, and quick about it, hell would come much sooner.
We snuck up to a small shed near the closest side of the mansion. I peeked around the corner of it, and I could hear the hum of a diesel generator out front. A jenny. One for electrical power.
I looked over to the car that was parked sideways across the driveway entrance. It was lit from the bright lights that shined from a couple of portable streetlamps set up closer to the front entrance. I saw a glow from a red cherry inside that vehicle that brightened and shined on a man’s face as he sucked on his cigarette. Then it died down, and in a bit, an exhale of smoke puffed out the driver’s side window. That single pause indicated that he was relaxed. He was not smoking fast.
This meant that he was unaware; he had not been told anything by the owners of this place. It also meant that No One was full of shit. He must have been delusional. The Purple Robes knew that we were here? They were on their way? Yeah, right. Good one, No One.
I turned back to the other two and smiled. “Time is on our side, fellas. We safe. Now let’s get to the rear and see if there are any open windows. And for the love of gawd, be fucking quiet.”
They followed my lead. We had a good nine or so hours until daylight. We would be gone long before then. Our eyes adjusted to the dim light from the stars overhead, and we began to make sense of the destruction of the place. All of the windows were blown out, except in the corners, all the way up to the top floor. Each of the windows on the ground floor were boarded up with plywood sheets. Lights glinted from windows here and there on the floors above. They must have set up some sort of temporary lighting system inside. It would have been dangerous to try to get the electricity started for this whole place with all of the water damage and busted walls. On the ground in the back, we stepped over broken furniture that had been flushed from the windows when the water tower tipped over and crashed through the roof into the top floor and released its contents inside.
Baptism.
Certainly, anything that was of value had been salvaged from the grounds, as well as the interior of the place. We were not looking to steal for monetary gain. We were looking for information, for data, for a single fucking clue. I wondered if there might be a room with satanic materials in it. No, not pentagrams on the floor from a melted black candle, or dead cats and chickens laying about in the corners, or goat heads hanging from the rafters with twine. There would be no giant black cauldron with bat wings and lizard tongues stewing in it. That shit belonged in a kid’s ghost story, or a B Movie.
Yet,
There must be something.
Anything at all would do.
We slipped past the pool area, and found that the whole back yard was paved with patio stones as we went along. I avoided the long swimming pool. I did not have much luck with them, you know.
We came to an area with metal patio furniture strewn about, and I stopped. This would do.
I looked around on the rear patio for an iron leg of a patio chair or the brass neck of a flushed-out lamp to pry one of the plywood sheets from a window, and as I did, I heard the sound of wood splintering and popping. I turned around and saw that No One had a good hold on a corner of one of those sheets and he was using his raw strength to pull it away. The ply wood was not all that thick, but they must have been secured with ten-penny framing nails and those were deep in the window jacks on each side. The sheet gave way before the nails would come out. It came away easier and easier until there was only the single line of nails across the top. It just hung there. He tried to wiggle the sheet to get the last part away from the wall.
I had an idea. I ran over and yanked on his arm to stop him. I said, “Hey, wait!”
He stopped, and he wasn’t even breathing hard for all his effort. He said, “What, Mr. Will? I can get this thing down.”
I said, “Leave it. It’s like a hinge up there. If anyone comes around to check out the back yard, it won’t be obvious that we went through this here window.”
He let the plywood sheet drop back down and it hung there. He turned back to me and smiled. He said. “I think all the nails popped through on the rest of it. Hopefully there ain’t any sticking out of it, or one of us could get hurt.”
I turned back to Lion Man and said, “You still got that flashlight?”
He came over and handed it to me. He said, “Well duhhh. Of course I do.”
I cupped my hand over the head and flicked it on. I let a small slit of light shine through my fingers and examined the sheet from the inside. He was right. The nails were not set in a straight line. They were sporadic. Some of them had not hit any wooden studs at all, and they stuck out of the plywood the sides. It looked like a rookie had set the nails in this sheet.
I said, “Come look up inside at this shit. We have to be careful of the sides when we go in and then when we come back out through here. Those few nails on each side will fuck someone up if we’re not careful.” All of the nails on the bottom of the board had popped through it, because they were set solid into the wide sill, and there they remained. The nails at the top in the header must have found good footing as well.
I cast the slit of light around inside the room to see what was inside. It was quite odd in there. There were aisles of shelves for books. It was a library. But there no books anymore. I cast the light to the left, and saw knocked over tables and easy chairs, and on the right, more aisles of shelves. Odd indeed.
I turned back to the other two and said, “All right, fuckers. We go in. Now hold this sheet away from me.” No One did, and I flicked the flashlight off and handed it back to Lion Man. Then I climbed in and fell to the floor. For some reason, No One let the board back down, and I heard them arguing outside about who would go in next.
“Fuck you, I’m next!”
“No, Joseph, I don’t want to get hurt by them nails!”
In the library, it was quiet. I could hear water dripping in the walls. I could hear a field mouse squeaking. It was probably pissed at someone invading his new home. And then I heard a hint of a whisper. It said, “Ssssshhhhhhh….”
My skin crawled. My eyes got damp with terror. I was not alone. I scrambled over to the board and pushed it back out. I wanted to get the fuck out. Someone was right behind me. I said, “Joseph! Give me the flashlight!”
He turned from No One and handed me the light. “You Ok? You look like you seen a gh---.”
I grabbed it from him, swung around, and flicked the light on. I saw a dim white face slip behind one of the stacks. I wanted to get the fuck out and I dropped the light. Lion Man crawled in from under the board and I backed into him as I panicked.
The light rolled away and shined on the walls as it circled about. There were other white faces shining in this room. They were coming in through the walls.
Lion Man said, “Ow! Weeee-ill! What the fuck you doing?”
He fell inside against me and I was paralyzed with fear. I said, “We need to get the fuck out. NOW!”
I crawled past him as he went for the flashlight. He grabbed it just as No One was coming in and he smacked me in the top of my head with his face. He said, “OW! Mr. Will, you just hit me on my face bruise!”
Then he fell on top of me and I could not move. I squirmed as he pulled his legs in and I could not breathe. Maybe it was my fear, maybe it was his solid mass, but I was fully in panic mode and I was stuck. Time to bail, time to visit the parole agent, time to get a job in the sunshine and forget about things that were not in my world.
My eyes streamed liquid, in my terrified state. I punched at No One and tried to catch my breath, struggling to get the big brute off of me.
Lion Man stood up and swung the light around. He said, “Huh. Looks like some kind of library.” Then he shined the light in my face, and I was blinded.
No One stood up, and he said, “I’m sorry Mr. Will. You Ok? Hey, who are all these people?”
Fuck that shit.
I was on my way out.
See you on Saturday for the next part. It will be quite long, my friend.
God Help You. God Help Us All.
---willies out.
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